Reflecting on Leadership for Change

This semester I learned about pushing forward. I have learned that its okay to experience frustration, because this will fuel your energy to keep going. I also learned that its your life, you are the author and you write your own story. Its perfectly fine to have the input of your family or peers but at the end of the day, its your call.

I want to reflect on key parts of my blog, beginning with my very first blog:

1st Blog: Why am I taking this course

My reasons for taking this course included learning how to change and lead my life more productively. I also wanted to be able to share what I learned with my peers. I also wanted to walk away fulfilled. Well, I have accomplished all of these! However, I believe that a semester is not long enough to learn these concepts and more. I do think that I have learned the preliminaries and can take what I have learned and try to master these techniques from this point on. Before this class, I thought I knew all about planning and scheduling, UH NO LOL. I learned some really good tips and tricks about planning even the minute task to the most grand.

2nd Blog: 5 Lives

During this Blog I got the opportunity to jot down 5 lives that relate to the life I want to live. The one that stood out was an emergency room doctor. I chose this occupation because it just makes sense! I want to have a job that is constantly changing, I want to be always stimulated, and on the edge of my seat. Being a detective or FBI agent is perfect because you are waken up during the wee hours of the murder being called to a murder scene. I cannot imagine myself sitting at a 9-5 job and doing the same mundane task that I did the day before. I would lose my mind and probably take my frustration out on people around me, no seriously.

3rd Blog: Planning Wall

I liked this activity because this hit home for me. If you were to see my room, you would see goals written on paper everywhere in my room. I have been doing this since highschool. However, I never did a planning wall where all my goals could be visually seen.

4th Blog: Business Meeting

I liked this activity because it gave me a chance to vent to someone close to me, I could retrieve advice from my partner. I could also plan out the week ahead. I will use this technique from henceforth.

How have I grown: I have grown tremendously throughout this semester, however I have suffered from a slight case of senioritis. At the the beginning of the semester, I started off so strong and then just a couple of weeks ago, got sick and began to slack. But, I have gotten back into the swing of things and plan to finish off the semester on top.

Thinking: I have a new outlook on things in life and school. I have taken away some life qoutes to live by, my favorite is the Keenan Ivory Wayan, "cushion" qoute.

Behaviors/Activities: I want to be more enagaged with my field. I am excited that I get the opportunity to work with my Criminal Justice professor with my independent study! I am going to make the best of this opporunity.

3 Best things about the class
1. Planning Wall
2. Business Meeting
3. Success Team

3. Least
1.Komives Book
2.Interviews: It was very hard to contact people and get a fulfilling interview.
3. ******

3 Improvemnts/Suggestions
1. More movies!!! The movies chosen were very inspiring
2. *******
3.********

Overall: I wish Dr. Rock was teaching the class next semester. I dont think the class will have the same zeal and zest that she provided. I wish her luck in all her endeavors :)

Business Meeting

This week we were supposed to meet with a buddy from class, however I guess our schedules clashed and we did not meet. Instead, I held a business meeting with my boyfriend of two years.

1. Report

I made my boyfriend read the Sher chapter that outlines the business meeting. I made him read it so he would understand the reasoning behind meeting and he could give his feedback in accordance to the way Sher says how to hold the meetings.

I explained to Jarrell(boyfriend) that I am really focused on getting into Grad school and at times, I think I should just focus on graduating in May instead. I told him for the past month all of my energy has been put into grad school and my senior class project. He told me not to worry everything will workout, because it tends to every time! He knows that God has a lot planned for me!

2. Problems and Solutions

The only problem that I am facing are my nerves! I like to have things in one place and fixed so that I don't have to worry about it. I am constantly fretting about my acceptance letter. I need to know yes or no. My patience and sanity is running very thin. I have learned from Jarrell, to be patient. I find this funny because I always tell him to be patient and everything will work out for the best! He basically was feeding me the exact same advice that I have given him over the years. No wonder the advice sounded so good(ha ha ha)!

3.Scheduling

Next week and the following week will be like the Ironman Triathlon! I am going to push myself like never before. I am finishing and completing projects way before their deadline. This is not the time to procrastinate!

Exercise: First Steps

This week was very relaxing for me. I had the opportunity to take Friday and Saturday off from work and just hung out with friends. I havent taken off of work in a very long time, I figured that I needed the break to regain some sanity. However, sadly I did not pick up my GRE preparation book :(, but I made a promise to myself that I will do some hardcore studying this week. I have sat down and outline my deadlines for my Grad School journey. I have e-mailed the people that I am looking to get recommendation letters from. I have also learned to be patient yet resilient.

Reflecting on Fear

I wouldn't say that this week was fearful or that any of the steps taken to reach my goal is fearful, because I just have the mentality that if I try and don't succeed, its fine and I should learn from it. However, I have been experiencing anxiety and energy loss. My mind is filled with multiple ideas and they seem to get all jumbled up together and it seems that I might never complete them. I have noticed that I need to take things one step at time. I need a huge planner that outlines everything step by step. Another reason why I am taking this class again, is because now I know what I need to do to succeed with my goals.

Moving and Shaking

This week I took the time to buckle down and study for the Graduate Record Examination exam that I have scheduled for December. This week I also registered for my last undergraduate semester and submitted my intent to graduate in May. With the submission of my intent, came a flow of emotions both rewarding and overwhelming. The last 3.5 collegiate years seemed to flash before my eyes. This week I tried to gain back some of my inner peace. It seems that as the months press on, things are becoming more hectic and I am trying my best not to fall off the deep end! This week also brought GREAT NEWS!!! I have been waiting for my independent study approval and received it last week. I will be working side by side with one of my Criminal Justice professors that I absolutely adore. He explained to me that he has a lot in store for next semester and the research that we are going to be seems very interesting.

Hectic Week/First Steps

This past week has been extremely hectic and depressing. I logged over forty hours of work and still got sick even after receiving the flu shot, but I pressed on. This week was one of reflection and determination. I met with two professors and outlined my reasons for wanting to go to Graduate School. Professor Hagedorn(Criminal Law and Justice Department) gave me key tips on how to succeed. I explained to him what I was currently working on for my senior project and he said I should take his independent research class next semester! If I could get into his class than I know that would be a step in the right direction. He is the type of professor that is a great motivator and allows you think outside the box. He has also encourage not to view things as black and white, but as a plethora of colors. Never take things by its' face value. Friday, I got the chance to meet with Professor Stovall(Sociology Department) before meeting with him I was worried about the GRE exam and the scores needed, but he took my fears down a notch. I never realized the importance of the personal statement for graduate school before meeting with him. I have to take time and sit down and outline my reasons for graduate school, including what I hope to gain and what I could bring to the department.

Things seem to be moving at a rapid speed at this moment, graduation is in May. Deadlines for everything seem to be around the same time.

Last week was a back and forth pitfall with trying to find interviews. I had one set-up but it fell through and then I got another and got stood up. And then...

Our lovely Mrs. Dade, gave me a contact that she knew, Chief Brown. I sent him a couple of e-mails and left messages at the police department but didn't hear anything until Sunday around 7:30p.m and at the time I was at work and didn't get off until 11:00p.m. He left a voicemail and he stated that he didn't know my assignment was due at midnight last Sunday until Mrs. Dade mentioned it at church! Thanks ANGELA! So I sent him an e-mail Monday morning while at work and now we are in the stages of trying to find time to actually do the interview.

This week has mostly been about getting into Graduate School. I also got the chance to speak to Dr. Erez in the CLJ Department. I explained to her my worries and what I was working on for my senior class and she said she would love to see me in Graduate School! Hopefully all the great feedback I am receiving is a sign that I will be able to get into Graduate School!

This class has truly allowed me to outline what steps I need to take to reach my goal. My ultimate goal wont come to fruition for another 5-10 years, but my current goal is getting into Graduate School and I wont stop until I receive that acceptance letter.

Even though this week was hectic, I got the chance to speak to two wonderful professors. I know now that I need to push myself even harder :)

Emotions with Planning Wall

I actually like the planning wall better than the flowchart! The planning wall allows me to look at something more "concrete" than the free flowing bubbles of a flow chart. My only hang up is deciding what I will be doing in the next five years! I cant even push past the next year. However, I like the month to year analysis of plans! On my planning wall I entered in goals that were not only academic but personal goals that I would like to achieve.

Planning Wall

Planning Wall!!!

Interview

This past week has been very hectic and also rewarding! At this point I am very overwhelmed with taking the GRE. I have been studying my workbook and also trying to complete homework and prepare for midterms at the same time. To add gasoline to the fire, one of rocks that keeps me grounded is in Aruba! My boyfriend left for Puerto Rico and Aruba yesterday for a week vacation with his family. I had the opportunity to go, but school is way more important! Anyway, it took forever and a day to get an interview with a detective (whom wants to remain anonymous). I ran into schedule conflicts and utter rudeness from his peers, whom I overheard said it was pointless talking to some college kid about his job. I have reached a plateau of in my life where I no longer let stupid crap like that bother me. After all of the problems I encountered with "time conflicts", I enlisted a little help from my boyfriends uncle whom is a cop. I asked him should I approach him a different way. He said in order to talk to a detective, you need to be humble and understand their authoriy. Basically, play the role that he is the best person on the face of the earth! Yes, he just told me, a person whom is not a follower or a kiss ass, to basically play the role of one to get what I want. He said detectives work hard as cops and take on long hours to become detectives. I complied. After going to his office and him not being there, I sent him a e-mail practically begging for an interview. I asked that the next time he goes for a coffee run, I would meet him. Supringsly, he said yes. He also said that I seem like a dedicated person and would be perfect for the job!

Interview Highlights

• Our meeting turned into a hour long conversation talking about real-life situations and the demanding role of a detective!
  
• The first step to becoming a detective, is being a police officer
  Take the night shift,if you can. This will allow for you to respond to high-crimes(Robberies, Murders, Burglaries)
  
• Become close to the Captain. Express your interest in become a detective. Usually after your first five years on the force
  
• As a detective, you have to be vigillante and dedicated. Which he said I already posses these characteristics because I would not leave this man alone!
  
• Stay in shape. Mentally and Physically. He says that I will come across very heinous crimes, I have to learn how to separate the job from my life.
  
• He said be prepared to be called all times of the time. If I want kids, its best to have them before becoming a detective. He said he missed very important stages of his kids life. He should have done it when he was a cop instead.
  
• I asked him why did he want to become a detective and his answer was very truthful and honest.
  He states he became a detective 70 % because of the money and great benefits. He said 30% for solving crimes. He said that he was going to be completely blunt, he needed money. He wanted a lot out of life. He wanted things that he never had before. He planned on having kids and he needed to support his wife. He wanted a house built from the ground up and wanted to fill it with everything "he" wanted. He says the 30% is the sheer pleasure of solving crimes and helping the community!

Interviews

Officer

Dave

Why did you become a police officer?

He states, "I became a police officer because my twin brother was shot over twenty times by gang members". All because he did not want to join a gang. I vowed that I would find his killers and to this day I have found one and I am working on the others. I have a personal vendetta against people who harm others. I joined the force for personal reasons, but as I trained and entered the force I noticed that I could help others and help solve crimes and its a very rewarding experience.

What steps did you take to become a police officer?

At the time that I became a police officer, the age requirement was a 18 and you did not need that much college. But now things have changed drastically. There are so many steps and rules to become a officer, you cant be discouraged. Now you must be at least 21, in good shape, a Bachelor's Degree, and not a speck of a criminal record. The reason why the rules are so stringent is because at one point in the 70's and 80's, gang members had infiltrated the police department, unbeknown est to the Captain.

Were there times where you did not want to be a police officer?

Of course. The moment I am dispatched to a crime scene of children. I have two kids of my own and I have to take a step back and breath and remember this is my job and I going to see some heinous and sad things. My first call as a rookie was to the crime scene where a mother flung her newborn out of the window because he wouldn't stop crying. At the time my girlfriend was pregnant with our first baby. I couldn't look at the baby, I couldn't go into the apartment I stayed in the car and threw up. My partner whom was a veteran, came to the car and slapped me in the face. He yelled WAKE UP, this is reality. If you cant handle this, you cant handle the other crazy shit in Chicago. From that point on, I knew that I had to push on. I bit my lip and processed the scene.

Retired Remote Terminal Operator (Youth Division of Police Department)

Beverly

Why did you become a RTO in the youth division?

Crime and criminal behavior has always intrigued me. It boggles the mind what people are capable of doing to each other. Its even more perplexing what people do to children they gave birth to.

How did you become a RTO/ what do you do?

Well, I was 23 and was downtown with a friend putting in random job applications. At the time I was going to Business School. I went to city hall and read the job description and qualifications and applied. Within a week I was called to come in a take the typing test. I passed and they placed me in the Youth Division. A RTO, inputs data from police reports into a computer system for a audit trail of crimes done by youths or crimes done to youths in Chicago. We have millions and millions of files of some of the most horrific crimes.

* I was told a few of the crimes, due to privacy I will not post the crimes*

Were there any times you did not want to work in the Youth Division?

Not at all, I knew this was the place I was going to retire from. Other jobs did not give me a since of fulfillment the way this job did. I wouldn't change the long hours of putting everything together for anything in the world.

Analysis of Interviews

I learned from both interviews that Law Enforcement takes patience and dedication. I understand that by entering into this field I will come across things I have never seen or heard before in my life and I have to hve the strength to push through and complete the case.

Exercise #2: Five Lives

1. David Williams: Lawyer/Professor @ UIC
2. Linda Konczyk Clinical Nurse of Emergency Services @ UIC Medical
3.Chicago Sky Dive (e-mailing me more contact info)
4.Heather Risser Visiting Professor in Criminal, Law, and Justice @ UIC
5. Beverly Martin: retired from the Chicago Police Department

Exercise #1: Plotting my Goal

In Barbara Sher's Wishcraft, she states that the best way to plot a goal is to work backwards. All this time I have been plotting goals in the opposite direction. I would first start by listing what I knew to do to achieve that goal and at the end of the spectrum, there would be my ultimate goal. ( I tried to copy and paste a flow chart from Microsoft Excel, but the Blog Uploader does not recognize the file)

Goals(Linear Style)

Profession
*In two to three years, I hope that I have been accepted in the FBI Victimization Department. With the two years prior to induction, I will be preparing myself with a Master's Degree in Criminology and gaining a law enforcement background.

Post Graduate School
*After Graduate School I will hopefully be in law enforcement, either the police or federal sector. Throughout Grad School I hope to fil out at least thirty applications to suburban, state, and federal law enforcement.

Graduate School
*During this time I will be filling out applications for police departments and trying to narrow what I want to do in life. I will increase my network web and let people know that I will be looking for a full-time position after Grad School.

Undergraduate
*This is where I am now. I know I need to buckle down and study for the Graduate Record Exam and start asking professors for recommendations. I need to compile a package of documents for Grad School prior to the March 15 2010 deadline. I have started to piece the package together now.

Changes within Me!

For the next 5 months I will be changing, both physically and emotionally..more to come

Myers-Briggs Test

Portrait of an ENFP - Extraverted intuitive Feeling Perceiving(Extraverted Intuition with Introverted Feeling)

The Inspirer

As an ENFP, your primary mode of living is focused externally, where you take things in primarily via your intuition. Your secondary mode is internal, where you deal with things according to how you feel about them, or how they fit in with your personal value system.
ENFPs are warm, enthusiastic people, typically very bright and full of potential. They live in the world of possibilities, and can become very passionate and excited about things. Their enthusiasm lends them the ability to inspire and motivate others, more so than we see in other types. They can talk their way in or out of anything. They love life, seeing it as a special gift, and strive to make the most out of it.

ENFPs have an unusually broad range of skills and talents. They are good at most things which interest them. Project-oriented, they may go through several different careers during their lifetime. To onlookers, the ENFP may seem directionless and without purpose, but ENFPs are actually quite consistent, in that they have a strong sense of values which they live with throughout their lives. Everything that they do must be in line with their values. An ENFP needs to feel that they are living their lives as their true Self, walking in step with what they believe is right. They see meaning in everything, and are on a continuous quest to adapt their lives and values to achieve inner peace. They're constantly aware and somewhat fearful of losing touch with themselves. Since emotional excitement is usually an important part of the ENFP's life, and because they are focused on keeping "centered", the ENFP is usually an intense individual, with highly evolved values.

An ENFP needs to focus on following through with their projects. This can be a problem area for some of these individuals. Unlike other Extraverted types, ENFPs need time alone to center themselves, and make sure they are moving in a direction which is in sync with their values. ENFPs who remain centered will usually be quite successful at their endeavors. Others may fall into the habit of dropping a project when they become excited about a new possibility, and thus they never achieve the great accomplishments which they are capable of achieving.
Most ENFPs have great people skills. They are genuinely warm and interested in people, and place great importance on their inter-personal relationships. ENFPs almost always have a strong need to be liked. Sometimes, especially at a younger age, an ENFP will tend to be "gushy" and insincere, and generally "overdo" in an effort to win acceptance. However, once an ENFP has learned to balance their need to be true to themselves with their need for acceptance, they excel at bringing out the best in others, and are typically well-liked. They have an exceptional ability to intuitively understand a person after a very short period of time, and use their intuition and flexibility to relate to others on their own level.

Because ENFPs live in the world of exciting possibilities, the details of everyday life are seen as trivial drudgery. They place no importance on detailed, maintenance-type tasks, and will frequently remain oblivous to these types of concerns. When they do have to perform these tasks, they do not enjoy themselves. This is a challenging area of life for most ENFPs, and can be frustrating for ENFP's family members.

An ENFP who has "gone wrong" may be quite manipulative - and very good it. The gift of gab which they are blessed with makes it naturally easy for them to get what they want. Most ENFPs will not abuse their abilities, because that would not jive with their value systems.
ENFPs sometimes make serious errors in judgment. They have an amazing ability to intuitively perceive the truth about a person or situation, but when they apply judgment to their perception, they may jump to the wrong conclusions.

ENFPs who have not learned to follow through may have a difficult time remaining happy in marital relationships. Always seeing the possibilities of what could be, they may become bored with what actually is. The strong sense of values will keep many ENFPs dedicated to their relationships. However, ENFPs like a little excitement in their lives, and are best matched with individuals who are comfortable with change and new experiences.

Having an ENFP parent can be a fun-filled experience, but may be stressful at times for children with strong Sensing or Judging tendancies. Such children may see the ENFP parent as inconsistent and difficult to understand, as the children are pulled along in the whirlwind life of the ENFP. Sometimes the ENFP will want to be their child's best friend, and at other times they will play the parental authoritarian. But ENFPs are always consistent in their value systems, which they will impress on their children above all else, along with a basic joy of living.

ENFPs are basically happy people. They may become unhappy when they are confined to strict schedules or mundane tasks. Consequently, ENFPs work best in situations where they have a lot of flexibility, and where they can work with people and ideas. Many go into business for themselves. They have the ability to be quite productive with little supervision, as long as they are excited about what they're doing.

Because they are so alert and sensitive, constantly scanning their environments, ENFPs often suffer from muscle tension. They have a strong need to be independent, and resist being controlled or labelled. They need to maintain control over themselves, but they do not believe in controlling others. Their dislike of dependence and suppression extends to others as well as to themselves.

ENFPs are charming, ingenuous, risk-taking, sensitive, people-oriented individuals with capabilities ranging across a broad spectrum. They have many gifts which they will use to fulfill themselves and those near them, if they are able to remain centered and master the ability of following through.

My Feelings about my Results:

Ouch! What an eye-opener! First I want to list the strengths and weaknesses that the test says that my personality involves:

• 
  Good communication skills
  Very perceptive about people's thought and motives
  Motivational, inspirational; bring out the best in others
  Warmly affectionate and affirming
  Fun to be with - lively sense of humor, dramatic, energetic, optimistic
  Strive for "win-win" situations
  Driven to meet other's needs
  Usually loyal and dedicated

All of the above is true. I love to make people laugh and I love to give gifts just for the sheer reaction from the person. I am always the person that friends come to for advice.

Weaknesses:

Tendency to be smothering
Their enthusiasm may lead them to be unrealistic
Uninterested in dealing with "mundane" matters such as cleaning, paying bills, etc.
Hold onto bad relationships long after they've turned bad
Extreme dislike of conflict
Extreme dislike of criticism
Don't pay attention to their own needs
Constant quest for the perfect relationship may make them change relationships frequently
May become bored easily
Have difficulty scolding or punishing others

A few of the weaknesses are far from the truth! The tendency to be smothering in relation to a relationship is the opposite. I hate to be smothered. I like to have time to myself. Its true that sometimes I dont pay attention to my own needs. The idea that mundane matters such as paying bills, are uninterested. Yes, who likes to pay bills. But for a 21 year old with two jobs, I am very responsible when it comes to paying my bills, IN ADVANCE!

Overall: I believe the test is a good way to look at my personality. I am very extraverted but it took years to reach this point. I was once quite and reserved and I learned that the world will run you over. In high school and towards reaching adulthood, I began to exude my inner "loudness" sort of speak to the outside. Not in a wild and crazy way but in a way that shows, I'm not the one to play with". I believe this can help me trangress into narrowing my career goals. Being an introvert can help or hinder opportunities. On the other hand being an extravert can come off as "cocky", but at the same time can appear to be open and not shy. Either way, my personality changes with my mood. But most of the time I am an Extravert!

Exercise #1: What is your touchstone?

Brianna Dream: FBI agent

Touchstone: Financial Stability/helping Victims

Role Model: Cassandra Chandler (African American Woman, Special Agent for FBI)

Target: unlimited possibilities for living my life to the fullest without financial constraints

Reading the Goalsearch chapter made me realize that this entire time that I have been setting short-term goals, I have been doing it wrong. For example, I will organize and set a date and believe that this is "set in blood" and if I falter then I fail. For years, I have set milestone days to lose weight and within a week of "messing" up I quit. Now I know that mistakes make the goal stronger. This has now encouraged me to try losing weight again!

As for my career goals (Long-Term), I know that I don't want a stereotypical job from 9-5. I dont want to sit behind a desk and do busy work that I will hate. Having the perfect job that interests me, will help me overall in life. Mood, emotions, and well-being will be improved. Money makes our world revolve and studies have shown that when a person is finacially stable, other factors in their lives are high, such as family and social aspects.

My goal is two fold. Yes, I want to financial stability, but I also want to gain training and expertise in the field of Criminal Justice so that I can solve cases and help victims.

Doing something that I love (In-Class Assignment)

My favorite thing that I love to do is, when I have the free time, I like to snuggle up on the couch with a snack and watch episodes of real life police drama. For example, Forensic Files, Jail, the First 48 etc. I hate the drama shows like NCIS or CSI. My overall goal is to help Victims in the Heinous Crime unit of the FBI. I know that one can not even apply to the FBI without the necessary law enforcement or college background. On Saturday night I was walking with my boyfriend and notice a detective sitting in the car waiting for his partner. At first I was hesistant, but I walked up to the detective and engaged in a little chit chat. I told him that I was a senior and will graduate with a Bachelors in Criminal Justice Major in May 2010 and I wanted to know what internships were available with the Chicago Police Department. The detective gave me some background and general info and then he gave me the number to the Human Resources Department of the Police. I am currently in contact with the department.

Interview with 5 Friends

Question asked to all friends, What do you think are my greatest gifts/strengths?


Friend #1 Jennifer : My Best Friend

Jennifer said that my greatest strength is that I am a great listener in comparison to our other best friend. She says that I am the person that she asks for advice before her sister and her mother because they will only put her down and go off on a tangent about themselves.

Friend #2 Jarrell: My boyfriend of 1 year and 3 months

Jarrell says that my greatest gift is that I care too much for people. He says that I am a truly caring person even when someone has done me wrong I still try to show compassion, but he also says that could be a downfall or weakness. The conversation strayed from my strengths to me being a strong dominate person.

Friend #3 Justen: Friend from High School

Justen says that my greatest strength is that I can take criticism and let it roll of my back.

Friend #4 Jessica: Friend from Freshmen Year Psychology Class

I met Jessica Freshmen Year of college in a random situation. She had missed a week of classes and asked me for my notes. I also offered to tutor her for the test. When asked, she said that I went above and beyond what she asked for and she appreciated my caring spirit.

Friend #5: Pierre : Ex-Boyfriend

I saved the best for last! Me and Pierre were together for two years. We knew each other inside and out. We expressed our attractions to each other mentally and physically within the first few months of being together. You must be thinking, why did we breakup? That's the thing, we were so enthralled with each other it became smothering. I noticed that Pierre was very egotistical and arrogant and it made me sick. He said that my strengths was that I was sweet and he knew that I was a "good" and wholesome girl that he thought he would marry and women after me have fallen short of his expectations. The reason why I saved this for last is because he was the first person to ask me what were his strengths. (Hmm...sounds like the arrogance kicking in) I couldnt think of anything off hand so I told him his weaknesses instead. If there were strengths in him, perhaps it would outweigh his weaknesses.

What do you love?

Interview with my Mom

According to my mom, I was a peculiar child. She said that I had an "old" soul. I grew up around mostly adults in my family, even the closest of cousins were teenagers. She said that when she would be getting ready for work and making me breakfast, instead of watching Sesame Street or Barney, I preferred the Soap Operas. I would engage with the dialogue as if I knew what was going on. My mother believes that the Day Care I attended really gave me a head start in life. My preschool and homework regime in conjuction to my mother stressing Education gave me an early push to life.

What things did I like to Play?

My mother said that I would constantly play with either a chalkboard, cash register, or my baby Mickey. The baby Mickey Mouse was a doll that I carried around from the age of 2 until I was 10. I took him to school, grocery store, grandma's house, etc. I treated him like he was my baby. She noticed that I had an obsession for Cash Registers. I would beg and beg for the next biggest and flashiest cash register. I asked my mom if she thinks I loved them for the money and she said no, she believes I liked the interaction that I had with "imaginary customer". She also said that I would like to play school and set up my bedroom as if it was a classroom. She hung up educational inspirations on my wall and different academic media would be scattered throughout my room.

What did she think I would become would I grew up?

My mom states that she thaught I would be a teacher or scientist. I asked her why and she said I was fascinated with both outlets. I excelled in school and I like to help others.

Childhood Fascinations and Dreams

I was a weird child in the sense that I was the only child. I had to basically play by myself, with my mom, or my cousins who were 10-12 years older than me. For some odd reason, I loved cash registers, I liked the dings and whistles and the money drawer. As a child I had over 10 different elaborate cash registers. My favorite was a Barbie Cash Register that taught you how to count money. I would imagine that customers were in front of me and scan their purchases, tell them their total, take their money and give them change and receipt. I also had a fascination about teaching. My mother bought me a blackboard easel that was just my height. We would go to the teachers supply store and get workbooks. I would sit down each Saturday and plan out my week for my "students" (my teddy bears). The following week after I would come home and do my own homework, I would put on my moms heels on and set up my teddy bears and pass out the daily assignment. As a child, I lived through sight. I have a photographic memory that at times is very creepy what I can remember. I am very good with directions and remembering landmarks. As a child my mom could go to a new place and I could remember the route by remembering what was on the side of the road! The cash register fascination could have been an insight into me helping people via customer service??? And the teaching could have been my interest in helping youth??? But as Sher pointed out in her book, none of these childhood dreams could have anything to do with what your interested in now as an Adult, but maybe a hint or clue. I still want to help people, but through a different "genre" or "spectrum". My ultimate goal is to help people whom have been victimized through heinous crimes.

What do you hope to get out of this course?

I hope that at the end of this course I have walked away very fulfilled. I hope that I will learn key success tips and tricks that I will be able to share with my peers.

Why am I taking the Leadership for Change Class?

I am taking this class because I am at the point in my life where I need solid direction. I am ready to put my skills and knowledge to work. I "understand" the concept of applying my skills, but how? I hope to retrieve those answers from this class. Over the past year, I was one of those people that complained about finances and blah blah blah. I then realized that I am not the only one suffering and that there are more people worse off than me. I changed my mindset and decided to volunteer at the Greater Chicago Food Depository. I want to be able to volunteer more and donate my time.